you walk out to your car. you realize your steering wheel is missing. jesus took the fucking wheel.
because people seem to be forgetting about all the other kinds of absurd christmas apparel
"how will i explain gay couples to my children”
if you can explain to your children that an immortal man in a red suit who lives in the north pole travels around the entire world on one night every year on a sleigh carried by magical flying deer i think itll be easy enough to tell them two people are in love
why are girls expected to go through an experimental lesbian phase but u never hear about dudes goin gay for a while whats up w/ that
cause that would be realllllly weird, unlike girls doing it. guys actually like when girls do it.
do me a favor and staple all your fingertips together
when youre wearin a cute outfit in winter and someone is like “aren’t you COLD” excuse me you are weak and your crops will never last the winter with that attitude